Admit You Love Me: A Secret Baby Romance (Irresistible Billionaires Book 2) Page 20

  “What makes you think that?”

  “I ran into him in the village yesterday with Riley. I’ve heard talk that he’s taken lodging at Ben’s tavern.”

  “You know better than to gossip, Prue,” I said, heading down the stairs. I kept the finer details of my personal life private, not because I didn’t trust her. Mostly because I was embarrassed. I didn’t want to admit the whole Riley paternity debacle to her. I wondered, since Niall was apparently still in Belshire, how long a rumor that he was Riley’s father would take to circulate. Niall had shown up unannounced at the estate to see me? Whatever could he want, I wondered cynically. I had a few ideas.

  Firstly, he was probably here to yell at me some more about not telling him about Riley. He was here to really stick the knife in my chest and twist. Maybe, he was here to tell me that his lawyers were going to be handling the matter from now on and he was about to sue me for custody of my son. Perhaps he was here to tell me something outrageous like he had bought the estate and was here to kick me out. Each one of the theories seemed as plausible as the next. The part of me that still wanted to see Niall was being overridden by the part of me that thought we were never going to see each other again.

  I had resigned myself to it. Seeing him that angry at me, I almost wanted a punishment. What I had done was wrong, it was beyond wrong, but it was the only thing I could think of doing in order to make sure that my son was okay. I wish that I had more options, but I didn't. Had the circumstances been different, had Russell been the less of an asshole, had I known who Niall was, maybe I would have contacted him and told him the truth. Wishing for things to be different at this point was useless because they were not going to change. A much better place to direct my thoughts was the future. For the first time in a long time, I could count on having a relatively bright one.

  I was a little bit upset that Prue had let Niall in. She didn't know what happened between us and therefore didn’t turn him away, but I should have said something. Niall, instead of waiting in the entryway was at the doorstep. It made my chest hurt to see him again, but I didn’t want to show it. I walked up to him, doing my best to seem unaffected.

  Had that confrontation really only taken place yesterday?

  It felt like so much time had passed, I didn’t know why. It made me more anxious, like I didn’t know the appropriate way to respond to him.

  Okay, it was fine, everything was fine. He was a guest. He was on my turf. I did not have to be scared of him. I had home-field advantage.

  “Is there something you want?” I asked, coming up to the door. Unlike last night, he was looking at me with a neutral, almost bored expression on his face. The energy coming off of him was neither hot nor cold. This was more frightening than his anger from yesterday because I didn't know which way he would go from here.

  “Yes. I came here because I want you.”

  “What did you say?”

  “I came back here because I want you, Eddy. I'm here because I want things to work between us.” I was speechless momentarily. I wasn’t sure which way he would go. That particular direction wasn’t even on the list. My heart kicked in my chest.

  “What on earth makes you think that’s going to work? Were you there for anything that happened yesterday?”

  “I lost my temper. I was angry and I said a lot of things that were very cruel. Please forgive me.”

  “Why do you want me to forgive you? What difference does it make if you're going back to London and I'm staying here?”

  “If I do head back to London, it's going to be with you and Riley. I know that there is a lot of water under the bridge, but we can get over it. Many things have happened, things between us are certainly not simple, but I want us to work it out. I never realized that I had a family but now I know that I do, and I cannot walk away from them.”

  I scoffed. “You had a change of heart and I’m supposed to just fall in line?”

  “No. I expect you to hold me accountable for every promise I make you. Make me work for it. Sweat for it.”

  “Niall, I…” I stopped, hearing Riley’s shouts from outside. I pulled Niall into the house and closed the door behind him. “Just a second,” I told him. I trotted up the steps and called for Prue, asking her to go and handle Riley. Niall and I stood in silence as Prue walked out the door.

  “You were saying?” he asked me.

  “I just wanted to apologize again. I can't tell you how sorry I am. I know nothing can make it better. You deserved the truth from the beginning. I know my reasons might not seem good enough to you, but I did what I had to for my son.”

  “It’s going to take some time, but I know I can’t hold that against you. If you want to try to make it up for me, let me be with you. Let me raise our son now.”

  “I can’t let someone into Riley’s life if all they're going to do is walk out again.”

  “I want forever, Eddy. I’m not going anywhere.”

  I was shaking. He had said all this before but now, he knew the truth; the good, bad and the ugly. He still wanted me. I took a deep breath. “But… our issues,” I said.

  He came up to me, taking me by my arms. “We have forever to work on them, babe. I’ll do whatever it takes. I love you. I can’t live without you. I need you, Eddy. I want this.” he leaned down and kissed me. My body went up in flames. He wanted me, even my darkest, most secret parts. He embraced every part of me. I felt so free, so loved. I pulled away and took his hand.

  “Come on,” I said, leading him towards the stairs. We went to my bedroom. Falling onto the bed, we were ripping each other’s clothes off before we closed the door behind us. I was ready for this. This was my future, and I couldn’t wait.

  33

  Niall

  “Christ, Eddy, stop,” I said. She looked up at me, my cock in her mouth. She looked so sexy like that. Slowly, she let my cock pop out of her mouth.

  “What did you say?” she asked. We were on the bed, naked, her between my legs, jerking my cock in her hand. It was the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. I pulled her in so her body covered mine, then rolled us over so I was on top of her. She laughed, her laugh turning to moans as I slipped into her.

  Gorgeous. Perfect. Beautiful. Mine, all mine. She was mine.

  We made love, completely losing ourselves in each other. She felt so amazing, I knew I wouldn’t last long. I clutched her to my body.

  “I love you,” I whispered in her ear. She moaned, writhing under me. I said it again. I meant it with every part of me. She was everything I wanted in this life and I couldn’t wait for the rest of our days together.

  “I love you,” she returned. Her orgasm came first. When she clenched around me, spasming, I shot my load deep inside her. I closed my eyes. This was it. This was right. I wanted this. She wriggled off of me, leaving me strangely cold. I reached for her.

  “I’m going to the toilet, give me a minute,” she said, laughing. With our history, you could imagine I was sensitive about her leaving me, even if it was just to go to the loo. I closed my eyes again. The toiled flushed and Eddy walked back into the room.

  “Everything good?” she asked.

  “Huh? Yeah, why?” I asked.

  “You look pensive,” she said, settling back onto the bed. She sprawled onto the sheets and I gathered her back into my arms. There, that was better. Now the picture was complete. She was what I needed. She made the picture complete. She was home. Riley made three and that was my family. I went from zero to family in a day. The news had hit me hard at first but now it was starting to feel natural.

  “I was just thinking about you,” I said.

  “I haven’t gone anywhere,” she said. I kissed her temple and smelled her hair.

  “And neither have I,” I said.

  “Is that so?” she asked. I wanted her. I needed her. I wasn’t walking away again. We weren’t having another five-year break. We weren’t having a break of any kind. This was it. I was officially off the market and so was she.


  “Yes,” I said.

  “So…”

  “Yes,” I repeated. “I told you when I walked in here, didn’t I?”

  She looked up at me. “Are you really serious about that?”

  “I am, Eddy.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “What kind of question is that?” I asked.

  “How are we going to make it work?”

  “What is there to figure out? The house and everything can be sorted out. We can restore the house and I can pay for the property upkeep.”

  “That’s not what I meant. I meant us,” she said.

  “What about us?”

  She moved so she was leaning away and looking down at me. “Things are complicated, Niall. What about Riley?”

  “He’s our child. What’s the problem?”

  “It’s as simple as that, is it?”

  “We get married and I adopt him. Do I have to adopt him? He is mine.”

  “Yes, but Russell is on the birth certificate.”

  “We can change it. My lawyers will handle it. Nobody has to know the truth. As soon as it’s done, Riley becomes the legal heir.”

  “That’s it?” she asked.

  “That’s it. What were you expecting?”

  “What about your family?”

  I scoffed. “I’ve never given a toss what they think before this point, why would I start now?”

  “I can't believe it.”

  “The reason I even came back home was because my father wanted to play matchmaker.”

  “No, it’s not that. Well, it is, a little but I just can’t believe it. That night when we met, all those years ago I never thought anything like this would come of it, you know? I thought you were just a fit guy who turned out to be kind as well. My newlywed husband turned out to be such a disappointment that I thought meeting you was just a way to get back at him in some way. He had given me up so easily, you know, it hurt my feelings but I didn’t think you’d have such an effect on me. To be honest, I haven’t stopped thinking about that night.”

  “The same thing happened to me.”

  She touched my chest. “That night meant so much more than just a romp to get back at Russell. That was when Riley was conceived.”

  I felt myself smiling. “I never stopped thinking about you. It was part of the reason I couldn’t marry Lisbeth. I was in love with someone else.”

  “In love?” she asked.

  I nodded. “I love you.”

  “I know. You told me. I just wanted you to say it again. I love you too,” she said, smiling.

  “Seeing you again was like… I thought I was hallucinating. I knew I couldn’t let you get away again.”

  She settled on the bed again. “I’m not going anywhere,” she said. Oh no, she could go, as long as I was with her. As long as she always came back. As long as wherever she was, everyone knew that she was mine. I wanted to laugh thinking about it, not because it was funny, just because I was so happy. The rest of my life with her? I couldn’t wait to do it. I wanted a family of my own making and now I had one. I had wanted Eddy for five years and now I had her.

  Just then, Eddy was scrambling off the bed.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked.

  “Riley’s coming,” she said. I heard footsteps outside the door. “Hurry. Get dressed.” I clambered off the bed, searching for my boxers. “Quick, unless you want to explain to a four-year-old why you’re naked.” I pulled them on as the door opened, laughing.

  “I have a lot to learn,” I said.

  “Mummy?” Riley said. He rushed into the room into his mother’s waiting arms. I wanted to remember that scene forever. They were perfect and they were mine, both of them.

  Epilogue: Edwina

  I looked at my reflection in the mirror. Yep, that was definitely me. With professional hair and makeup, and a dress that was worth a few thousand pounds, I looked hot. It wasn't even my first time in a wedding dress, but I looked great. I turned around slowly to face Missy.

  “So?” I asked her. She had tears in her eyes. “Oh, don't you start.”

  She sniffed. “I'm sorry, it's just that you look so beautiful. You look amazing, really.”

  “You saw me in my last wedding dress too, you know.”

  “I did, but that marriage was to an awful man who didn't love you and treated you like trash throughout your marriage. As far as I'm concerned, it didn't count. Besides, Niall sprung more money for the dress so it’s nicer.”

  I laughed. Missy was the biggest detractor of my first marriage to Russell. She hadn't trusted him from the start, and she was right not to. All of that seemed so far in the past now wearing a wedding dress again. To be honest, I didn't know whether I would ever get to walk down the aisle again. When I said my vows, I meant them, but then death did part me and Russell. Even after his death, I wasn't sure that I even wanted to remarry, let alone date. Right after Russell died, I wasn't looking for anyone. Niall quite literally bowled me over with his reappearance. Seriously, I didn’t stand a chance against him with our history.

  The dress was objectively nicer than the first wedding dress that I wore. It was off white, you know because white is for virgins. It had a sweetheart neckline, a cinched waist, and a billowy, flowy skirt. With the train and the veil, I looked like something out of a fairy tale. We were at the estate. We had both decided that that was where we wanted to get married, no-frills. It was either here or a destination wedding. The idea was to have the smallest group possible in attendance.

  In the past three months, the estate had gone through a complete overhaul. The grounds were back to their former glory, even better. The house itself had been going through renovations and we were making additions to it as well. The ceremony was taking place outside, near the house, and the reception in one of the house's new editions, which we hadn't finished yet. When it was done, it was going to be a spacious family room. For today, it was a reception hall.

  “Where's my bouquet?” I asked. Missy picked the bouquet of white and yellow flowers off the bed and handed it to me. She was one out of my two bridesmaids. Niall had two groomsmen, one of whom was Riley. We were doing it small, on purpose. Nobody who didn't deserve to be there was going to show up. This was a total one-eighty from my last wedding which was full of people I both knew and didn't know, but didn't care about me. This time, it was only our closest friends, both of our families having been left off the guest list.

  It was for the best. Neither of our families had come around when we told them that we were making wedding plans. Niall's family, very much in tune with their usual behavior refused to acknowledge his decision. They were pretending that if they didn't acknowledge it, it stopped existing. I was estranged from my family after everything that happened with Russell. They were interested in the marriage and wanted to come especially since Niall was a man of an even higher title than Russell had. Of course, that meant they weren't invited. As far as I was concerned, they were not reaping the benefits that they thought they would because of my marriage to Niall. The only reason they were so happy about it was because Niall was rich.

  The money was nice, I would never pretend that it wasn't. Because of the money, I had one less thing to worry about. All of Russell's old debts were paid and the estate had stopped looking like an abandoned wasteland. I was eternally grateful but now I had the marriage and family life that I never had with Russell. Niall was kind and engaged and he loved Riley and me with his whole heart. During my first marriage, I thought I was getting my fairytale ending but it turned into a nightmare. This time, I was finally getting my happily ever after. I turned around one more time so I could see myself in the dress with a bouquet. That moment, the door opened and Brenna walked inside. She stopped in her tracks when she saw me.

  “Oh, oh my God, you look amazing,” she said coming up and hugging me. Brenna, Niall’s cousin's wife didn't come around to the UK as much as I needed her to. We hit it off the first time that we met and we had stayed in touch through the period
s that she and Charlie were back in New York. Speaking of New York, the past few months had been the longest time that Niall had spent in the UK since he had moved to New York all those years ago. We had been back and forth a few times since he still had a home and his belongings there, but for the most part, we had lived here on the estate when it wasn't undergoing renovation. I was excited for Brenna to meet Missy and just as I predicted, they got along like a house on fire.

  “They're ready for you.”

  “Perfect,” I said. “You guys head down, and I'll be out in ten minutes. Both of the women hugged me before leaving. I was walking down the aisle alone, for obvious reasons. I laughed. From the outside looking in, our wedding looked a little bit sad. It was like two orphans getting married. Neither Niall or I had our families there, but that wasn't necessarily true. I would have Missy and Prue there, the closest people to me. Our son would be there and Charlie who Niall regarded as a brother would be there too. Those people were our family. They had treated us more like family than our actual relatives had, and I wouldn't get married any other way.

  When it was time, I went downstairs and walked outside. Behind the house, we had set up our little alter and seating area. The aisle wasn't very long since there weren’t that many people in attendance. Everyone important was there though. The music began as I approached the aisle, two wedding players on harps that we hired for the ceremony. Down the other end of the aisle was Niall in his slate gray suit. I tried not to look at him because I knew I would start crying. I walked down the aisle and stood in front of him.

  “You're beautiful,” he whispered to me. The ceremony was short. It was my second wedding so I had done all this song and dance before. I didn't feel like I was missing out by having a simple ceremony now. Thankfully, Niall was uninterested in all the pomp and circumstance and all he wanted was for me to be happy. The one thing I absolutely refused to skimp on was the vows.

  Niall went first. “Eddy, I'm not going to stand here and tell these people how we met because admittedly, it was under slightly unsavory circumstances. That was the day that planted the seed though, because after that day I never stopped thinking about you. I couldn't believe my luck when I met you again a few months ago in London. I knew then that it wasn't luck, it was something else. It was something greater, something bigger that said you and I were meant to be standing here today. This was the woman I was supposed to be with, and this was the family I was supposed to build. I don't know what led me here, but I'm so happy that it did Eddy. I'm going to spend the rest of my life by your side making you happy.”